#THE PROBLEM IS THAT GOOD DAD BATMAN IS WHO HE SHOULD BE BUT NOT WHO HE IS

[sing-me-under]

Look. Look. I still like Batfam. I think it’s fun and interesting and I like fandoms where the fans are actively engaging with each other…. I also think they need their own goddamn tag and needs to stop intruding into the rest of DC and even just straight up comics Batfam. Fanon Batfam just needs to be rebranded and be its own thing because if it is not its own thing, then I suffer trying to find literally anything DC that is not Batfam-centric. Y’all are fucking insufferable and need to keep your echo chamber contained.

Let me read fanfics based on the canon characterizations.

[lifetimeoftired]

Thought more on the 'Batfam in Danny's world' stuff.

Red Robin: What is this? -holds up a clunky early 2000s device he found in Danny's room between his pinched fingers, like it might bite him- Danny: Oh, my PDA? Tucker insisted on buying it for me but honestly I'm not really that great with tech so I don't use it much. He usually follows me around trying to manage my schedule with it. Red Robin: Concerning but, more concerning, this thing... Works? Danny: It's the latest model, so it should? Red Robin: Latest... -trying not to cringe- How do you connect to the internet on it? Or take pictures? Danny, with genuine excitement: Your PDA can do that!? Man, that sounds way cooler than the plastic that lets you see all the stuff inside! Red Robin: I'm In Hell.

Spoiler: Having villains for parents is the worst right? Danny: I mean, my mom accidentally brings the food to life and it tries to bite us. But the keyword is 'accidentally'. They're mostly harmless. Spoiler: They literally just shot at you??? Danny: They shot at Phantom. They don't know it's actually me you know? Also I don't even worry about it. They don't have very good aim since I'm not a danger to them and Dad only gets badass when mom is in danger. Mom's always a badass but it's good dodging practice. Besides, I'd be more worried about them dissecting me, what with the whole, I'm technically an entirely different species that they've been studying their whole life and don't think I'm sentient anymore. But y'know it's whatever. They're not actually all that bad and I know they love me deep down. Spoiler: I'm not sure whether to borrow Hood's guns and shoot you myself or kidnap you away from here and force Batman to adopt you. Danny: Wha-

Danny: Alright a few more adjustments aaaaand there! Signal: Oh wow! Thanks! It's nuce to be able to see again without getting black spots on my vision. There's so many ghosts around it can be hard to see. Danny, biting his lip trying not to laugh: No problem. Signa;: .... What? Danny: Nothing! You look great dude! Signal: ....... Danny: ....... Signal: What did you put on my face!? Danny: Sun glasses! Signal: -skids to a halt in front of mirror and sure enough they're sun glasses. But they're triangular and the hooks go aaaall the way up to hook around the bat-ear points and look completely ridiculous- Danny Why :( Danny: -trying to say 'sorry' through his giggles, but he's not really sorry-

Danny: Uuuuh Red Hood I can't see your face, but I'm kinda worried about how many guns you're loading right now. Red Hood: I just want your 15th birthday party to be safe, okay? Danny: I'll be fine? It'd be nice if the other ghosts gave me a day off sure, but fighting them seems safer. I don't really want my mom to bake a cake anyway. Knowing her it'd just come alive so if they forget this year it's fine. I'm just, those are real guns man. They're dangerous. Red Hood: They are. -cocks gun- For Them.

Robin: >:( Danny: It was a nice try. Robin: Do not patronize me Fenton! Danny: I don't know why or how, but that sounds even more insulting than when Dash does it... Robin: This is an indignity! Fighting immortals entities that cannot be harmed by blade is one thing- but I will not accept being spoken to like a child! Skulker will return and taste my fury! Danny: Hey calm down alright? Robin: Do not test my patience! Danny: I heard you like animals. Wanna meet my purple back gorilla friend? She's really nice and is easy to talk to. Robin: .... The gorilla... doesn't speak does she? Danny: Haha no of course not! I learned her language instead. Robin: ... You are a strange man. However I will accept your proposal for now and I insist you teach me every form of communication with her.

Orphan: :( Danny, who's always been able to understand Cass perfectly, much to the mystery of the batfam and her delight: Aw Cass, I love you guys too. It's been great having your family around- and really I'm flattered! But I can't be your new brother, I'm sorry, but we do live in different realities. Besides, I think I've had enough of people trying to adopt me. Orphan: ? Danny: Yeah my godfather is a total fruitloop. Always trying to kill my dad and marry my mom who hates his guts and get me to call him father instead. Like, he even tried to clone me and copy my brain into a new body right? Or that time he rigged the election to become mayor just to mess with me. And hiring actually competent ghost hunters so I'd quit (kinda wish I could quit actually but it's fine). His obsession with me can get out of hand sometimes you see. Orphan: >:( -cracks knuckles- Danny: What? No! I don't need protecting really! I can handle him just fine. Now that I'm thinking about it though, I dunno what he'd do with Jazz. He never seems to actually talk about her beyond that one time he tried to get her to attack me- huh? Orphan: -disappeared- Danny: ...... That probably won't come back to haunt me.

[wonderjanga]

Marvel not Caring

I feel like the few times Billy needs to get something over with, he just doesn’t care. Like honestly, I’m going to connect this to my Marvel Compilations post. (In that post I just talked about how Marvel could be a clip farm and the potential vids he would have) Let’s say these are all from the 8 minutes and 47 seconds of the Big Red Cheese tweaking out vid. Cause why not?

One day, Marvel’s doing patrol. See, he wants to get it done with, hopefully with no major villain attacks happening, because Darla has a school play, and he wants to see her, even if she got cast as a tree. But of course, things didn’t go his way, especially just when he needs to start heading out for the play.

*vid opens up to Marvel floating in the sky looking down at a Female Villain*

Female Villain: *attacking people and causing general havoc*

Marvel: *looks around for any cameras and doesn’t see the one recording the vid*

Female Villain: *sees him and his about to do something*

Marvel: *winds hand back (as if he needed to) and backhands her like an abusive husband*

Any Nearby Civilians: *cover their mouths as they look away. A good chunk of them sped walked away*

Female Villain: *knocked the fuck out*

I’m telling you right now, a good chunk of the comments on that video were something along the lines of ““that’s not right,” I whisper to myself as I speed walk away” or ““You don’t hit a woman,” I think to myself as I step into the safety of my car and drive away.” All stuff like that.

The day after that…

Marvel: “I just ended the problem as soon as I could, guys! I don’t beat women!” Superman: “We know! We know, but did you have to it so… so ferociously?”

Marvel: “Ferociously?”

Flash: “Dude, you looked like you’ve been waiting to do that.”

Marvel: “I haven’t! It was just effective, and I was on a time crunch.”

Flash: “Time crunch?”

Marvel: “Yeah, I had to see this person I know go be in a play.”

Batman: “Hn. You could’ve just said you wanted to see your child’s play. I’ll admit I’ve done something similar when Robin was in a play of his own.”

Superman: “Yeah. If the play thing is true, that’s a valid reason for any father to do that.”

Marvel: *a little confused as to why they assumed Darla was his kid* “Uh, yeah. I didn’t want to miss it.”

Flash: “Who was it for by the way? Junior or Mary?”

Marvel: “Neither.”

*silence*

Marvel: “You guys don’t know her. She isn’t a hero.”

Flash: “Dude… you have another kid? Why do you never tell us these things about yourself??”

Then, there’s another clip of Junior and Marvel. Beast Boy recorded the audio for shiggles and hid behind a wall but was surprisingly met with:

Marvel: “Okay, you know what, Junior? I don’t care that you’re disabled. Put your hands up.”

Junior: “Dude, I am not fighting you. You’re stronger than me.”

Marvel: “So? You’re only a little bit weaker. If you paid Mary like five dollars, I’m sure she’d fight with you. Now anyways put your hands up.”

Junior: “She’s not even here! And, hey- hey- Stop that!”

A lot of crashes and bangs could be heard for about 30 seconds. The video then ended.

Then, there’s another clip of him and Mary sibling arguing, but of course, most people think that Cap’s her and Juniors dad. So, when they say certain things, people tend to view it more extremely.

Marvel and Mary: *arguing*

Marvel: *says something completely outlandish that you should absolutely not say to a child*

Mary: *barely blinks and says something right back*

Marvel: “Oh so help me Gods, if we weren’t related, I would scrape your face across the pavement.”

Mary: “Oh yeah? Well if we weren’t related, I would skin you with a butter knife!”

The two proceeded to continue arguing before they somehow make up mid insult and go get ice cream like nothing happened.

Bonus:

Black Adam and Marvel: *floating up in the sky*

Black Adam: “You know, you’ve never said anything remotely similar to that to me.”

Marvel: “What’re you talking about?”

Black Adam: “I would scrape your face across the pavement.”

Marvel: *nearly has a heart attack when he says that*

Black Adam: “You said that to the girl. You’ve shown more disdain for that girl than you have for I.”

Marvel: “Uhhhh…” *panicking cause he doesn’t know about the video*

Black Adam: “Do you… not take me seriously?”

Marvel: “No, no, no, of course I do!”

In this AU, Marvel doesn’t really throw much shade at his villains aside from the occasional comment and that’s it.

[supershot73199]

Dpxdc prompt here.

Valerie goes to Gotham and gets a bat Boy/Girlfriend

So the setup for this is that Danny just got done helping the big bad bat with some big ghost themed problem. What was it? Doesn't matter but in the epic adventure that happened identities were revealed (its a good parent fentons so no adoption) and at the end Batman says "If there is anything I can do to return the favor let me know."

And Danny responds with "Actually there is something but it's something Bruce Wayne is better suited for."

Danny then goes on to explain what happened with Cujo and Valeries dad and how he's pretty sure that the way he was fired is illegal in some way. Now he's not asking for you to try to sue these guys but if Maybe you were able to offer him a job with a living wage so that Val doesn't have to stress so much since Danny can't do anything to fix this himself.

Bruce who had already planned to open some form of Wayne Tech branch in Amity to give him an excuse to be seen there if it was ever necessary just says he'll see what he can do.

So Damon Gray (also I love how he has such a similar name to a bat) gets a call from a Wayne tech hiring manager saying that they are opening a location in Amity and would like to interview him for a position. Damian gets the past the initial interview but he has to go to Gotham for a few weeks foe relevant training etc.

Obviously Valerie has to go with him so they pack up and are off on this all expenses paid trip with a bigger paycheck at the end to look forward to.

Now obviously Bruce's kids notice what is happening and after he explains that a young hero he met asked for his help in setting things right that he doesn't have the resources to do himself. Of course the kids have to meet the family that this (rather impressive from what Bruce was saying, which is not biased by him looking like he could be one of his kids no way) hero gave up a favor from the Batman for so they "just so happen" to stumble upon the two and in true batfam manner convince the tour guide to let them tag along.

Now here is where things get fun so depending on which bat you choose obviously determines who's all there as if you choose Dick then the only other bat's of that age would be young Jason and maybe Barbara if you drag her in. Now me personally I think the best choices are Damian who's not my favorite for this as I think Val would find it weird to date a guy who has such a similar name as her dad one of either Cass or Steph and while that could be fun i think the only Bat boy who as far as I'm aware has not had a badass vigilante girlfriend who can snap him like a twig so far is Duke.

Now some other reasons I think it might be fun for Duke and Val as a couple is maybe he can see the changes her red huntress suit causes to her with his powers thus leading to that initial curiosity that causes him to spend more time with her to get to the bottom of it.

Maybe she asks one of the Wayne's if they know somewhere she can get a good spar and the others sacrifice Duke as he's got the least experience under his belt (not saying he's a bad fighter but some of these bats have been fighting since before puberty) since they assume she's just a standard civi. He tries to hold back since again civi, but she knocks him on his ass before he can react before saying she probably should have mentioned being a black belt.

Just think of all the cute moments they could have together.

One interaction I thought of for after they know each other's vigilante identity and val learns Danny is why Bruce reached out to her Dad. (She knows he is Phantom in this)

"So that dork went out of his way to ask Batman for help even after I finally pulled my head out of my ass to see it wasn't his fault? Of course he still feels guilty over it, damn Martyr complex, we aren't even dating anymore!"

"You guys dated?"

"Yeah in civis while I was actively hunting him for revenge in our hero ids. Who dates a girl actively trying to kill you?!"

"Can't blame him."

"What?"

[wondersinwaynemanor]

thinking how Dick always finds ways to hang out with his brothers. but reality is that, they have grown with different schedules and locations and responsibilities. his brothers have partners now. Jason is a dad for goodness sake.

Dick finds himself often emotional. he is a man nearing his 30's, but he still often misses his younger brothers.

so Dick tries.

Dick, calls Jason, who is in Star City: Hey, Little Wing. You free this Saturday? There's a new action movie. Want to check it out?

Jason, pouts at the other end of the phone: Sorry, Dickie. I have to attend to Lian's reading playdate at her friend's house. Roy refuses to go.

Dick, feels a pang on his chest: Oh, of course, yeah. I'm glad you're there to teach Roy how to read.

Jason, laughs which makes Dick smile: Hey, lay off! But maybe we can watch another movie next month? My schedule is kinda booked this month-

Dick, doesn't mean to cut his brother off: No problem, Jay. Next time, yeah? Maybe me and Wally can visit soon.

Jason: You both should. Lian is asking for her favorite uncles. Please don't tell Tim and Conner I told you that.

Dick, laughs: I'll see you soon, Little Wing. Miss you. Say "hi" to Lian for me. And "fuck you" to Roy for me.

Jason, chuckles which makes Dick smile again: You got it, Goldie. See ya!

Dick keeps trying.

Dick knocks on the door of Tim's room and cherishes this moment, because Tim is barely at the Manor. Well, none of them mostly are at the Manor for years now. He enters when Tim says "come in".

Dick: Timmy!! Want to try this new coffee-

he closes his mouth when he sees Tim in front of the mirror, wearing a suit and fixing a tie.

Dick, frowns: Oh, you leaving already?

Tim bites his lip as he concentrates to fixing the tie. Dick chuckles and approaches Tim to do it for him.

Tim: Yes, going to Metropolis for a business meeting. Then off to New York after, booked that hotel for me and Kon.

Tim gestures to the packed bag on the floor.

Dick, feels a pang on his chest: Oh, right right. I almost forgot.

he backs up and smiles at his brother.

Dick: Well, looks like you're ready to go. You look handsome, Baby Bird.

Tim, smiles: Thank you, Dick.

he gives Dick a quick hug and Dick wishes it was longer.

Tim: See you next week, Dick!

Dick: Have fun! See you, Timmy!

before Tim exists his room, he turns around.

Tim: You were saying something a while ago? Sorry, I didn't catch it.

Dick: It's nothing.

Tim: You better tell me when I come back. Bye, Dick!

Dick, says to the empty room: Bye...

and Dick keeps trying.

Dick is barely with Damian during patrols anymore, so he's glad his brother called for back up, since Bruce was in another planet with the Justice League. Damian has grown so much, he's been using new suits, because he has outgrown a few of the older ones.

Nightwing: Hey, Robin. Want to catch some Big Belly burgers after we freshen up?

Robin: I think I'll have to pass, Nightwing. Superboy is picking me up in a few.

Nightwing, feels a pang on his chest: Right, right. He better not drop you.

Robin, snorts, but he smiles so Nightwing smiles also: He would never.

before Nightwing leaves Robin on the rooftop, he leans down to kiss the top of his head. it hits him that very long ago, he acted as his father figure when Batman was gone.

Nightwing: Take care, okay? Love you.

Nightwing thought he would not get a response, but as soon as he turns around to head for home, he hears Robin.

Robin: Love you, Akhi.

Dick has come to accept that his brothers are grown up now. that maybe he wasn't part of their lives anymore, he could honestly cry-

so when the door opens of their house, he expects to see Wally, bringing flowers and food like usual, but he sees his brothers instead. Jason has a box on his hand, which happens to be a copy of the movie they were supposed to watch. Tim has a bag of coffee from the new cafe place. Damian has a bag from Big Belly Burger. and if there tears on his eyes when they hang out that night, at least he's got his brothers to cuddle with on the couch.

[theskit]

Stickers AU

Important!!!

Direct linking gets rid of the readmore cuts!

If you came here via direct link, or wish to use the direct links to another part of the story, and DO NOT want to spoil the surprise stickers, please click on my blog name to go to the actual post after using the link.

Part 7

《Prev Next》

Sitting on the hotel roof as he tried to calm down from the high-speed flight away from Batman, Danny looked over his ill-gotten gains.

Ooh, candy! Why did Batman have candy? Did he have a problem with his blood sugar? Shrugging, Danny popped a sucker into his mouth. What else did he get?

Fiddling with one piece of a thin stack of black metal, he managed to click a concealed switch that caused the sides to expand from an unobtrusive oval to razor-sharp, wing shaped edges. Ow!

Shaking the sting from his left hand, Danny inspected the thin, shallow slice on his finger before holding it to the edge of his hoodie to keep his blood off things until he got back to the room for a band-aid.

Getting the now obviously a batarang to collapse back down, Danny beamed. Score! He'd gotten four of the things, one each for himself, Ellie, Sam, and Tucker. He didn't think Jazz would mind not getting a vigilante throwing weapon as a souvenir. She usually used the Fenton Anti-Creep Stick or the Boo-Staff, having been mostly banned from long-range weaponry on account of her inheriting Dad's aim...

Shuddering, Danny banished the memories accompanied by that thought in favor of the last item. Looking it over, it seemed like an airpod? Did he grab one half of Batman's headpho-... Oh, Ancients that was a communicator! Could they track it? Who was he kidding, of *course* they could track it!

Freaking out juuuust a little, Danny stuffed everything else into his pockets, grabbed the comm unit, and high tailed it, phasing through walls and floors in his hurry to get back to the room.

Once there he dove for his luggage, pulling out the Thermos he'd brought along just in case, and dumped the ear piece in before locking it down.

There. Heaving a sigh of relief, Danny slumped down against the side of the bed he'd claimed when they first checked in. The ecto-shielding on the Thermos should block any incoming or outgoing signals until he could get Tucker to look at it and make sure no one could trace the comm back to him.

Wincing against the light as the bedside lamp on the other side of the room flared to life, he saw Jazz squinting at him fuzzily, one hand on the Anti-Creep Stick propped up on wall beside the bed. "Danny? Izzat you?"

"Yeah, Jazz, it's just me. I just got back, sorry for waking you. I'm gunna wash up and head to bed. You can go back to sleep." Danny felt bad that he'd woken Jazz up after she'd had a long day helping set up the Fenton convention booth and gently riding herd on their parents' over enthusiastic responses to the other 'ghost hunters'.

"Okay Danny, glad you're back safe. Night," Jazz mumbled as she turned out the light and laid back down. Danny smiled at her softly before turning to gather his things. It had been a good night, if more eventful than he had planned when he first went out exploring.

Batman had traced the comm unit's signal to one of the larger, more popular hotels in the area before the strangely fluctuating signal had cut out entirely.

Inspecting the roof, he caught sight of a dim glow. Kneeling down, he collected what looked to be a few drops of fresh blood with a swab kit. It appeared that whoever had taken his gear had rested here for a bit before leaving again, possibly to check what all they had taken, then finding and disabling the comm unit. He hoped they hadn't injured themselves too badly, probably on the batarangs, if it was indeed their blood he'd found.

The dimly glowing sticker, still on its backing paper with a drop of blood on the corner, caught half under an air conditioning unit, pointed to it being the same person. Picking it up, Batman inspected it for a moment before dropping it into a separate evidence bag. He'd put both samples through analysis back at the cave.

@mygood-bitch99 @stargazer-luna @easily-broken-by-emotion @dolfay @britcision @cyber-geist @is-this-even-relatable @alcorbearson @fisticuffsatapplebees @thegatorsgoose @my-mom-calls-me-rat @some-rotten-nest @crystalqueertea @meira-3919 @wandererofthestars @seraphinedemort @bjurnberg @blep-23 @stargirl1331 @bianca-hooks123 @addie-lover-of-stories @pickleking8 @iconicanemone @sarina-elais @mur-ururu @sailor-goddess @dragonfirefeather @nutcase8691 @ravenpainter

[seekingxanadu]

On the issue of Alfred being a bad dad to Bruce, of Alfred enabling Bruce's bad behaviors:

I think the problem is modern Batman writers made the mistake of making Alfred a father figure to Bruce. An elderly employee can call his much younger perhaps-about-to-die employer "son" but that doesn't make them father and son. So when they get cute with the "aw Alfred is Bruce's papa" narrative, they end up making Alfred's character worse. Alfred's most consistent take has been that he is an employee and it is most visible with or around his interactions with Dick. Alfred seems to think of Dick as Bruce's employee. Again, it is a mentality from the 30s-40s when it was very natural for rich men to collect strays - I'll give you room and board, you will earn your keep by working in my land/business; to Alfred, Dick becoming Robin was to support Bruce's Batman in the field.

But modern Batman writers have woobified Bruce. He's not just the 35-40 year old wealthy businessman, scion of an old wealthy family, who has collected vulnerable youngsters around him and offered them a safe place. In the 30s and 40s, a 35-40 year old man was expected to be mature and a familyman. In the 90s and after, a 35-40 year old wealthy man isn't expected to be that anymore. Then again, it was the period that started to de-age Bruce. Because Dick, his first ward, was already an adult now.

So DC needed to make Batman younger and at least, deflect the idea of Bruce being a parental figure to a 20 year old man. So we started getting Alfred being Papa to Bruce, of Bruce and Alfred forming a family unit blurring lines of parent and employee. BUT Bruce was also the vanity projection of these Batman writers - they don't listen to their papas, so why would Bruce. Bruce was not Alfred's son, Alfred should know his place as employee. So we get Alfred written as just loyal employee who looks at Batman's allies as people serving Bruce. If Jason gets "a good soldier" plaque, Tim and Damian got Robin suits to just go backup Master Bruce already. And Dick?

Dick is a curious case with Alfred. Alfred clearly cares for Dick like a son. There is more familial closeness between Dick and Alfred than between Jason, Tim, and Alfred. Alfred has known Dick since he came to the manor as an 8 year old. It's a boy Alfred can claim to have raised- or at least, fed, cleaned, housed, medicated. Alfred knows Dick has Master Bruce's back in the field. In this regard, Dick is Alfred's extension. Alfred serves Master Bruce in his civilian life, Dick serves Master Bruce in the field. To be clear, I am assuming Alfred's thought process. Not Bruce's or Dick's. Sometimes, it feels like Alfred considers Dick another Wayne servant, equal to Alfred's rank.

All this rambling to say, I think Alfred is used as excuse to limit any blame that Bruce deserves for his bad decisions.

Just like some writers and stans make Dick apologise for Bruce's violence against him; we are now using Alfred as smokescreen to excuse Bruce's actions.

I am, by no stretch, saying Alfred is blameless. But Alfred is an employee, an old man probably very possessive of the Wayne scion who had only Alfred along during his growing years, and he is standoffish as any butler.

This is also why the idea of Bat "family" is so flawed. They are not a family. They are a clan of allies. They are a disparate set of individuals operating under the Wayne umbrella. Alfred is not Bruce's papa. Dick and Jason are not brothers. Their time in Wayne manor did not even overlap. Same with Damian and Jason, Damian and Tim. Damian and Dick mirror Dick and Bruce of 20 years ago and those two dynamics are that of a familial unit (though Bruce breaks the tie with Dick multiple times).

[gffa]

You would think, after a month of voracious reading of BATFAMILY fic, that I would at least begin to slow down, because I still primarily read I’m Having Dick Grayson Feelings And I’m Making That Everyone Else’s Problem, but I have also discovered that I have Jason feelings, I have Tim feelings, and I have Damian feelings. Which of course I knew before, but what I really learned is that other people have made this my problem now, too. And by that I mean that there’s amazing fic on all of the Bat babies and I am not immune. So, you may still have to scroll a bit, but if there’s an idiot badass with black hair and blue eyes, you’ll hopefully find something here to cry about with me, because what are any of us even in this fandom for, if not for the Feelings Hell About Vigilantes With Emotional Problems? BATFAM FIC RECS - BABY DICK IS THE CUTEST FERAL ROBIN I’M NOT HEARING ANY ARGUMENTS: ✦ it is with my whole life by dustorange, dick & bruce, 2.2k      Nine-year-old Dick’s been kidnapped. Bruce tries not to fall apart. ✦ World’s Finest: Lake Weekend by WingFeathers, dick & bruce & clark (& clark/bruce), 10.3k      Bruce and Dick invite Clark to the lakehouse for a long weekend around Rosh Hashanah, but Dick has trouble sleeping outside the Manor, and Bruce isn’t as available as he should be. And all of this brings up a question: what exactly are the three of them, a bat-vigilante and his ward and his superhero boyfriend? Could they be something like a family? (And how will they eat with Alfred not taking care of them?) ✦ Revision by takadainmate, dick & bruce, 3.8k      New to Bruce Wayne, new to being Robin, new to being alone, Dick didn’t believe there would ever be anyone there for him again. ✦ count the stars by emavee, dick & bruce, 3.7k      He doesn’t know what to do. It’s not like he can stop the storm. If he could wave a magic wand and make the sky clear—or even if he could call up someone from his large contact list full of metas who could control the weather—he would. He would honestly disrupt Gotham’s weather patterns if it meant Dick would stop crying. Or: Dick doesn’t like thunderstorms, so Bruce takes him somewhere where they can’t touch him. ✦ cautionary tale by drakefeathers, dick & bruce & young justice, 11.4k      Q: “Why did Queen Bee want Robin taken in alive in Bereft?” A: “Think of Speedy as a cautionary tale.” ✦ batman & robin by chickenmuffinsoup55555, dick & bruce, 4.8k      The Batman has a shadow. A shadow clad in reds and greens with a smile like sunshine. Bruce is adjusting. ✦ five times someone told Bruce he was a good dad�� by emavee, dick & bruce & clark & selina & cast, 10.3k      …and one time it mattered ✦ Phobias by RascalJoy (DarkQuill), dick & bruce & alfred, 18.4k wip      It was stupid. It was irrational. Dick knew that. There was no good reason for him to be afraid; he had been doing this for most of his young life. And yet… Five times Dick fell, and the one time Robin didn’t. ✦ I Hate Dick by JeanjacketCarf, dick & bruce & talia, 3.7k      “Robin wrapped his legs around the Bats’ neck and rested his head on top of the cowl. Then he stuck his tongue out at Talia. Talia felt her face growing hot with anger. She tried to restrain it. The Bat loved this child for some unholy reason.” ✦ shades of blue by thatsveryambitiousofyou, dick & bruce, 2.4k      Dick Grayson has blue eyes. Or the one where Bruce tries harder BATFAM FIC RECS - ADULT BATSON AND BATDAD ARE MY KRYPTONITE, I FOLD LIKE WET CARDBOARD FOR THEM: ✦ Withdrawal by Sohotthateveryonedied, dick & bruce & cast, 1.8k      It’s been six hours since he got dosed. The green ring around his eyes has been faded since dawn. It won’t be long before the withdrawal hits him in full force. ✦ The Post-Mission Ponderings of Brucerman and NightBunny by Ptelea, dick & bruce, 4.8k      This is just sheer (metaphorical) fluff to follow up on the (somewhat more literal) fluff of Wayne Family Adventures, season 2, episode 54, S'tel ees a cigam wohs! Heavy on the puns, even heavier on Bruce being struck by amazement at how much he loves his oldest son. ✦ gotta make a stand (but I am just a man) by CaptainOzone, dick & bruce & alfred, 2.3k      Bruce makes it back to the Cave, injured and exhausted, but remarkably alive. He expects Alfred to meet him. He meets someone else. Or: a third credit scene in which Nightwing makes an appearance. ✦ The Hand in My Hand by audreycritter, dick & bruce, 4.4k      Dick offers himself in exchange for some hostages and it does not go as planned. ✦ Yesterday by I_Have_To_Get_Off_This_Planet, dick & bruce, 1.5k      Dick was pretty sure this was what dying felt like. He was curled up, almost in fetal position, on his bed in the Manor. He was there for the holidays, and he had been looking forward to their entire family being together for once. Even Jason had agreed to come. And now he was gonna die before Christmas even arrived. ✦ I Bet On Losing Dogs by Anonymous, dick & bruce, 2.5k      (Or; Bruce’s relationship with his oldest and how it slowly starts to mend, with only a little push from his friends.) ✦ You can pick your battles but you can’t pick your poison by woodenwashbucket, dick & bruce, 1.8k      “Hey, am I bleeding a lot somewhere?” Nightwing asked. Batman gave him an unimpressed look, but Nightwing shook his head. “Seriously. I feel off.” Nightwing wobbled. Batman grabbed him by the shoulders before they could find out if he would have fallen, and Nightwing met his eyes with undisguised alarm. “Ok, maybe worse than off,” he said. BATFAM FIC RECS - EVERYBODY LOVES DICK: ✦ what’s past is prologue by Icestorm238, dick & bruce & jason & damian, time travel, 18.1k      Dick Grayson, bestowed with the memories of an alternate life, decides that things are going to go better this time. Priority number one: preventing Jason’s death. ✦ exactly how this grace thing works by irnan, dick & bruce & barbara & jason & cast, de-aged!dick, 22.7k      Dick gets de-aged. You’d think this would be a routine thing. ✦ sick day by daringyounggrayson, dick & roy & titans, 1.2k      Dick tries to power through a cold and lead a training session with the Teen Titans. It doesn’t exactly work out. ✦ The Gravity of Tempered Grace by CamsthiSky, dick & bruce & jason & tim & damian & selina, 10k      He’s sick, he finally catches on, and at that moment, a cough builds up in his chest, and he barely has enough energy to sit up enough to let his lungs work properly. A coughing fit later, and Dick’s breaths are making a horrible wheezing sound that makes him sound like one of Titus’ chew toys. That’s bad. He’s pretty sure that’s bad. ✦ you swallowing matches by torielle, roy/dick & bruce, NSFW, 8.2k      A month after being fired as Robin, Dick is forced to attend a Wayne gala, and is grateful for a particular friendly face. ✦ The Shape Of You (Was Jagged And Weak) by WinterSky101, dick & bruce & slade & jason & tim & damian & batfam, 40.6k      Six months ago, Nightwing died. They never found the body. Last week, Deathstroke arrived in Gotham. He brought a partner with him. ✦ You say you wanna stay by my side (Darling, your head’s not right) by wlwintersoldier, roy/dick & lian & donna, 2.5k      Dick is stupid and reckless on a mission, whats new, and Roy deals with the fallout ✦ Laundry Mishaps by JeanjacketCarf, dick/babs & jason & tim & damian & cass & steph & duke, 3.5k      Dick’s siblings often show up unannounced and take his stuff without asking. It’s how they show their love. Or Dick’s washing machine is commandeered for Steph’s laundry, his clothes disappear, he goes to girl’s night, has brunch, gets a little shot, and picks his baby brother up from school in about a week and a half while the secret group chat has a grand old time. BATFAM FIC RECS - JASON TODD IS AN ASSHOLE CAT, I’M GONNA THROW HIM AT DICK BECAUSE IT’S FUNNY (AND MAYBE SOME OF HIS OTHER SIBLINGS TOO): ✦ Two Dead Birds by InsaneTrollLogic, jason & dick & tim, time travel, 29k      There’s some lunatic in a red helmet running through Jason’s territory. He wants to think it’s a copycat. He’s wrong. BATFAM FIC RECS - DICK AND DAMIAN WERE THE BEST BATMAN & ROBIN, I’M NOT HEARING ARGUMENTS ABOUT THAT EITHER: ✦ Won’t You Stay A While? by fishfingersandjellybabies, dick & damian & cast, 2.8k      Ric did not expect to find a child sitting on the hood of his cab. Damian did expect to get his brother back. ✦ birdgrief by windupclock, dick & bruce & damian, 1.5k      How could you? Dick doesn’t say. Get out of my sight, Dick doesn’t say. What the hell is wrong with you? Dick doesn’t say. Tim storms out. Dick is left to deal with Damian. ✦ we’re like long lost brothers who found each other (and love each other like family) by drakefeathers, dick & damian, 9.3k      ongoing collection of scenes set when Dick is Batman and Damian is his Robin, ranging from cute to sad (hopefully not too sad). not chronological. ✦ I’ll Carry You by BrickSheep, dick & damian & bruce & tim, 2.1k      Dick Grayson will take every opportunity he can just to carry Damian in his arms. ✦ in my own imperfect way by notquiteaghost, dick & damian & bruce, 1.8k      Dick jokes, a lot, about being the only reason Bruce still remembers how to talk to people. About breaking him in for everyone else. He was Robin first, and he was Robin longest, and he’s why Bruce took in the others, he’s why Bruce isn’t dead in a ditch somewhere. And the jokes are funny! He’s never trying to be passive aggressive, or guilt trip, or whatever else. He and Bruce have spent enough time, now, pointedly not actually looking at each other, pulling words out in painful fits and starts. Dick knows where they stand. They’re good. But. ✦ (Un)Fortunate Son by Syl, dick & damian & bruce & cast, 26.1k wip      Bruce reaches a decision about Damian. Dick disagrees and decides to do something about it. BATFAM FIC RECS - BATKIDS ALL HAVE MANY SIBLINGS AND THEY’RE ALL PETTY ASSHOLES AND/OR WONDERFUL BABIES AND I LOVE THEM WITH MY WHOLE BEING: ✦ Overcoming Our Antecedents by Batbirdies, jason & bruce & dick, 31.4k      Bruce swallows, closing his eyes for a brief moment before he takes another, steadying breath and presses both hands to his face. He just needs a moment. Needs to remember where he is, what year it is, that Jason is not actually fifteen, he only looks like he is. This is temporary. This is just a temporary problem that needs to be contained until they can change Jason back. This is not a repeat of events already passed. This is not a second chance. ✦ what’s past is prologue by Icestorm238, dick & bruce & jason & tim & damian & barbara & steph & cast, time travel, 84.9k      Dick Grayson, bestowed with the memories of an alternate life, decides that things are going to go better this time. Things take a few unintended turns, and the consequences of his actions ripple through his family. ✦ And the Scene Slips Away (To the Evenness I Fake) by Kirazalea, bruce & dick & jason & tim & damian & cass & duke & alfred & cast, rape aftermath/read the tags, 37k      One mistake is all it took to force Jason back into the wonderful world of the Wayne family. Now publicly and legally alive once more, he’s forced to spend the next two weeks of his life stuck in the Manor with the whole family. This leads to several strengthened relationships and the realization that maybe he’s missed a few things over the years. Things that he’s now determined to get to the bottom of. ✦ now the clock is melting (so’s my mouth and so’s my mind) by SilverSkiesAtMidnight, tim & bruce & dick & cast, 4.1k      The League’s base is not built to welcome strangers. Bruce is not a stranger. ✦ what catches and who holds by victoria_p (musesfool), dick & cass, 3k      Dick never wanted to be Batman. Cass always did. ✦ Bet on it by Lysical, jason & damian & jon, 2.4k      Even Damian could admit that his older siblings occasionally had their uses. “I need your assistance,” Damian said, voice low and tense. “No,” Jason replied, and hung up. ✦ a soft place to land by unchosenone, dick & tim, 3k      Tim rubs the back of his head, trying to affect a joking tone. “I knew I should’ve just gone for the new escrima sticks.” Dick is ready to be a good big brother to his grieving little bro. Tim flips the script. ✦ Consanguineous Ministrations by Briarwitched, bruce & kon-el & clark & dick, 23.9k      “Who gave you a baby?” Dick demanded, the instant Bruce opened the front door, eyes drawn immediately to the sobbing infant on Bruce’s hip that he gently bounced to no avail. At the same time, Bruce muttered, “I told you, it’s fine, you didn’t have to come.” Alternatively titled, “Let’s give Batfleck alien baby problems”. ✦ The League of Extraordinary Bowling Bats by chibi_nightowl, dick & jason & tim & damian & bruce & alfred & cassandra & stephanie, 5k      “What did Dickiebird do? Steal all your other shirts?” The shirt is bright green with wide yellow stripes pretending to be a pin stripe running vertically across it. On the back, in bright red letters, “Timmy” is spelled out. “You’re next,” he spits out, shooting Jason the worst glare he could muster. “He’s got one for you too.” ✦ a cheese raspberry flavored void (except not really) by dottie_dc (dottie_wan_kenobi), Marzue, SilverSkiesAtMidnight, Squintyfist (ErzasCake), dick & jason & tim & damian & bruce & alfred & cast, 3k      “Jason.” Dick walks up to the desk, suspiciously peering around. Jason jerks and attempts to get in his way, but Dick is quick and fully willing to vault over his brother. Only, Jason immediately latches onto him, and the momentum sends them stumbling back, knocking into the desk. It’s a good thing Jason stopped him, for right behind the desk, where Dick would’ve landed, is a swirling void. ✦ The Talk by InsaneTrollLogic, dick & bruce & jason & tim & damian, 2k      Bruce never gave Dick the Talk. Dick was grateful for that right up until the time Damian sat through his first health class and started asking questions. ✦ Brothers in War by IaMcHrIsSi, jason & dick & cast, 3.2k      Jason, Cass and Damian ran from the League. In Bludhaven, they run into Dick. Literally. Dick just wanted to get breakfast. ✦ Baby I’m Bi Bi Bi by Sohotthateveryonedied, dick & steph, 1.5k      Dick catches her staring. “Oh, yeah. Forgot I had that. I bought it for when Wally, Donna and I were planning to go to Gotham Pride last year but a Joker thing came up and I didn’t get to go. You can just toss it. I have a ton of other bi merch and I only bought that one because Donna pressured me into it, anyway.” Steph looks down at the t-shirt and bites her lip. “Actually…I think I’ll keep it, if you don’t mind.” ✦ two attempted robberies too many by tsuchann, dick & bruce & jason, 2.2k      Dick could have knocked out the man before he had the chance to blink let alone pull the trigger, but he wasn’t dumb, and he worried his reaction would have caused the other robbers to shoot, because in the bank, at the middle of it all, with a gun pressed to his head, was Dick’s little brother. ✦ That the Ripest Might Fall by Ellegrine, TheFightingBull, dick & jason & tim & damian & bruce, reverse robins, 2.4k      Jason stared at the fallen chandelier. The priceless, fallen chandelier. They were dead. They were so, so dead! ✦ the butler’s neighbor by deargalileo, tim & alfred & bruce, 16.6k      it starts with a baseball, thrown onto the wayne’s property. it’s alfred’s job to deal with such happenings, of course. but over tea and galas, it turns into so much more. after all, why should bruce be the only one allowed to adopt any child that he finds? ✦ the straw drawer by deargalileo, dick & bruce & jason & tim & alfred, 7.4k      sometimes, love is stored in the straws. a story about family, traditions, and gifts, through the medium of crazy straws. (a companion piece to the butler’s neighbor, so i would suggest reading that first) ✦ you gotta push all the doubt to the side of your mouth by danishsweethearts, dick & stephanie & cast, 1.7k      Steph practices mindfulness. BATFAM FIC RECS - DICK/BABS FOREVER AND YOU CAN SHUT IT IF YOU DISAGREE, THEY’RE ADORABLE TOGETHER: ✦ Crime and… by Ladymercury_10, dick/babs, 1.7k      “Are you punishing me with glitter? That’s not a very good punishment, Babs.” ✦ the dickbabs baby au. by thychesters, dick/babs & batfam, 49.1k wip      Telling Dick she’s pregnant is much more stressful than she was hoping it would be. Them telling the rest of their families and friends? Yeah, easier said than done. BATFAM FIC RECS - I WILL DIE ON THE HILL THAT TIM DRAKE’S TRUE LOVE INTEREST IS CONNER KENT AND NOBODY CAN STOP ME, NOT EVEN GOD: ✦ buy back the secrets by sundiscus, tim/kon & bruce & clark & jason & cast, 48.1k wip      He takes a long, slow breath. Ignores the glares from the other students. “Superboy,” he murmurs. “It’s me. If you’re listening, I could use some help.” Or: 5 times Superboy saves Tim Drake, and one time Tim Drake saves Superboy. ✦ Grevious Misuse of TTK (or, Alternate Uses for TTK) by Cfae8, tim/kon, NSFW, 1.4k      Tim wakes up to someone touching him. But Kon’s hands haven’t moved. ✦ The Lost Art of Minding Your Goddamn Business by JpegDotJpeg, tim/kon & jason, 2k      Tim just sputtered, looking thoroughly scandalized for someone standing in the middle of the irrefutable evidence of his own fornication. If the furniture looked this bad, Jason couldn’t imagine that little Timmy had escaped Superboy’s super cock completely unscathed. “It’s not that bad,” Tim said, gesturing to the carnage, but he didn’t even sound convinced of his own words. “It looks like the fucking honeymoon scene from Twilight in here.” ✦ Practice Makes Perfect by rotasha, tim/kon & jason, NSFW, 18.3k      Kon is trying to seduce someone – he won’t tell Tim who – and he enlists Tim’s help to try to hone his flirtation skills. This surely won’t end in disaster for Tim, who’s had a thing for Kon practically since they met. BATFAM FIC RECS - TAKE THE ANGST DIAL, TURN IT UP TO ELEVEN, AND BREAK THE KNOB OFF, THAT’S WHAT I’M HERE FOR: ✦ Wait, What? by PandasandDucks13, dick & bruce & titans, 2.4k      Dick Grayson finds something interesting while applying for college. On a side note: He should really evaluate how many felonies he commits on a regular basis ✦ Dawn Breaks Through the Window by sElkieNight60, dick & bruce & jason & tim & damian, depression/read the tags, 14.7k      Without realizing it, Dick has fallen into a listless apathy, but when an incident cuts a little too close, Bruce and his brothers are there to remind him just how loved he is. ✦ Wisdom Always Chooses These Black Eyes and These Bruises by audreycritter, dick & bruce, 3.2k      After a severe, life-changing injury, Dick and Bruce have an epic fight and then fall back together. Sometimes, family hurts you the most, but that doesn’t stop how much you need them. ✦ your continental divides by isawet, reisling, dick & bruce & damian & barbara & cassandra & stephanie & donna & roy & wally & artemis & cast, rape aftermath/read the tags, 26.7k      When running doesn’t work and working doesn’t work, home is the place you go where they have to take you in. Dick’s home has never been Gotham; it’s always been the people.

[miniaturesuitgladiator]

Hi 👋 I'm knew to posting stories so please don't be rude , I understand that this isn't what some people like ,but there's no need to be rude. I appreciate everyone who read my first post and I am very grateful for them. Please leave tips on how I can improve. Thank you for your time and enjoy!!

Note: this is the first chapter of that little drabble I did. This chapter doesn't include damian or the batfamily. Next chapter it will. I just wanted yall to see readers family dynamics ,and I didn't want to make the chapter so long. Oh ,and N/N= nickname.

WARNINGS: None really no one is yandere ,yet.

-💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗-

It was snowing. Which should be no surprise to you ,atleast not at this time of year. It always snowed in October ,always. As always the snow was beautiful and quite peaceful as well. Watching the perfectly white snow fall onto the dead leaves on your yard was quite peaceful.

Comfortably sat on your living room couch waiting for your dad to get ready for church. You quietly watched TV. You had already been ready for about half an hour. Decided in it was best to get ready earlier than later. Just like your mother had always told you. Your mother always rather be early to an event rather than on time ,and usually she was on early. But then came your father. Now Your father was the complete opposite of your mother. I suppose that's what evens them out.. See your father always seemed to have a problem with keeping up with the time. So more often than not you'd be late because of your father.

You didn't mind though, atleast not as much as your mother did. You found it funny how your tall and fierce father. Sherrif of the small town you live in. Looked like a kicked puppy as your mother scolded him.

you silently watched as your father practically ran through the house looking for his church clothes. You smile as you see your mother walk towards you. She smiles back at you and kisses you on the top of your head. "You ready for church , baby " she says walking to kitchen. "Yes ma'am " you say turning your attention back on the TV. "Good" your mother says packing the food she plans to bring to church. You sigh in frustration. There's never anything to watch on Sunday. So you resort to the only channel that might be interesting. The news.

Your eyes open in excitement when you see the headline for today. BATMAN SAVES GOTHAM FROM A NUCLEAR BOMB! You always liked batman. You thought he did good. Sure he made some mistakes ,but he was only human. After all he had saved Gotham , like a thousand times. So he had to be good.

"Baby turn that off. I don't want you seeing that kind of stuff." Your mom says from behind the kitchen counter. "C'mon mom it's batman. He's a hero." You say trying to persuad her. Nothing big like that ever happened in your small town. Sure you were gratefull that your town wasn't always being attacked ,but nothing even slightly exciting happens in your town. So you live off the gossip of gotham.

"The only hero you need is Jesus. So turn. It. Off. I'm not telling you agian, baby." Your mother says gently smiling at you ,but you know better than to push her buttons. So with a dramatic sigh you turn off the TV.

"Thank you. Now go check on your brother for me." She says pointing towards your brothers room. " whatever" you say quietly ,scared of what she would say if she heard. Because in her eyes that's 'disrespectful'.

"Riley are you ready?" you say knocking on your brothers bedroom door. No reply . So you knock agian. No reply. "I'm coming in."You say and your shocked about what you see when you open the door. Riley your 7 year old little brother is sleeping peaceful in his bed. quickly you rush over to his bed. "Riley wake up ,mamas gonna kill you." You say as you shake him. Slowly he opens his eyes. "What's wrong N/N." He says and you almost feel bad for how concerned he looks ,but then you remember.. He's the one that decided to play Mario Cart all night.

" It's Sunday riley" you say. You watch as realization hits him straight in the face. Quicker than you can imagine he's up and running around in his room. "Oh no , does mama know I slept in." He says grabbing him a towel to take a shower. "No , she thinks your ready." You say but surely he didn't hear you by how quickly he rushed to take a shower.

Being the kind sister you are you grab him some cloths and leave them on the bed.

Deciding that it's definitely best not to go back to the living room. Since your mother would probably ask about riley. So instead you go to your room.

walking in your room you stand in front of the mirror your grandpa had made for you. Looking in the mirror you definitely thought this was one of the best outfits you had worn to church. Not the most expensive though ,since most of your clothing was thrifted. Nevertheless you did love your outfit today.

"I'm ready." You hear you father yell. "Well it's about time." You hear your mother reply. You smile to yourself as you walk towards the front door. You know your mother and father love eachother, but to someone that doesn't know them would probably think their about to sign divorce papers any minute. "You look beautiful ,princess."your father says with a light kiss to the top of you head.

"Riley!" Your mother yells ,since she didn't see your brother by the door. "Coming." He shouts back. Hurriedly your brother practically runs down the stairs. " how do I look." Riley questions and you don't even have to say what's on your mind. Because your father beats you to it.

"Like a mess." Your father says. Which earns him a punch on the arm by your mother. "Nonsense , you look handsome baby." You mother says as she gives him a kiss on the head ,and pats his hair so it doesn't look like a literal mess. "Thanks mama." Your brother says with a smile. "Well we better get going or we're going to be late." Your mother says. As she practically pushes everyone out the door. "Darling, it's only 7:10 by the time we get there we're going to be 40 minutes early." You father says with a sigh. Unlocking his truck.

"Which is practically late." Your mother says hopping into your father's Ford. To which your father just shakes his head with a smile.

The drive to the church wasn't long ,but you wish it was. So maybe you could get to watch it snow for a little longer. Snow was beautiful. Snow seemed to cleanse everything and turn it white agian. Which if you said that to your mother she'd probably say Jesus does the same thing...

Looking over to where your brothers sitting. You can see he's passed out. His head is resting on the window and he's drooling a bit. He looks kinda cute ,but that's only cause he's asleep and not cuase trouble. An you know it.

'Today is gonna be a good day.' You say to yourself ,and Who wouldn't think that it's Sunday. Every Sundays a good day because we get to go to church ,and see family. Maybe it was a bit naive to think that just because it was Sunday it was going to be a good day ,but that's how you were raised.

Ten years from now you'll look back and wish that for once. Just once in your 16 years of having lived your family would have missed church this sunday...

-💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗-

THANKS FOR READING!!!!

[youngbounty]

I don’t think it should be a hot take when I say that Jonathan Kent should never have aged up. This isn’t about who is shipping whom, because I’d be genuinely surprised if even JonJay fans disagreed with me on this.

Let’s actually consider this: if Jon had not been aged up, how would any of his storylines and adventures have changed overall? Sure, yes, there would be a few tweaks, but would Jon’s age have prevented the events of The Legion of Super Heroes, Superman Son of Kal El, Dark Crisis and storylines afterwards. I dare even say it would have made those storylines and Jon’s character so much better.

Let’s go on this rabbit trail here for a second. Even if you liked Son of Kal El and maybe even shipped JonJay. If Jon had never aged up, stayed on Earth age 10, maybe grew to be 11 and met Jay at that point in time, it can go two ways: either Jay would be written the same age as Jon (11 years old) or Jay would still be 18ish and Jon would just have a one-sided crush on an older guy. Either way, the idea would have been more interesting in exploring Jon’s sexuality at a time when he’s just starting puberty. Because he’s young, it would have given room for Jon to grow and develop. Even the Teen Titans under Damian explored his sexuality despite his crush being terrible imo. First love’s are likely to work better if the character is still a child or minor.

The problem comes down to Jon aging up to seven years in a few days. His character is now a shell of what he once was. Jon was already strong and developing. He was becoming his own little person separate from Superman. Hell, if we’re going to talk about making Jon diverse, he was already diverse and dealing with discrimination for being a mixed Kryptonian and human. He was hunted down by a Kryptonian clone of his dad to eliminate any “human impurities.” He was tricked and betrayed by his own hometown, who used alien cow’s milk to “protect him” from needing to be Superboy and as a result had hindered his powers from activating. Evil Tim’s Batman hunted him down to kill him because his human and Kryptonian genetics clashed hard enough for Jon to create a solar flare that was capable of destroying a part of the world. These are issues Jon deals with that are the equivalent of what children of mixed races go through such as health conditions, their own being skeptical of them because of the other half of their race from both sides and often being belittled for being a “half-breed.” Until Jon was aged up, he had to be checked by Batman himself because the Fortress of Solitude and regular human doctors weren’t capable of checking a half Kryptonian and Human child. Then, Jon got aged up and his health concerns and the discrimination conflicts from his own were thrown right out the window.

My point is that Jon’s character arc and conflicts were thrown out the window the moment he aged up. Sure, there are some good comics with Jon here and there like Tom King’s Super Sons’ Adventures in Babysitting, but for the most part, Jon’s character has been reduced to a clone of Superman. Whatever happened to Jon’s personality that came from his mother like his stubbornness, tamper and sassiness? Whatever happened to that Jon that led a bunch of demon dogs he rescued to save his parents? Whatever happened to the boy that went Emo over accidentally frying his pet cat to ashes?

I guess Jonathan Kent truly died in that volcano when he was sucked into a wormhole.

[artemismoorea03]

DP x DC Prompt: Kindred Spirits

(aka yet another prompt where Ari accidentally writes a oneshot instead of a prompt because they get overly excited about their ideas. Inspired by the Danny Phantom episode Kindred Spirits (hence the name))

President Luthor passed a handful of laws, countless half-assed laws that sent the goverment into chaos and made a mountain of paperwork for the League. That mixed with a handful of attacks in different areas of the world that needed their attention, the fact that one of their most dangerous enemies was in charge of an entire country, and a handful of other variants they were too buried to be aware of the Anti-Ecto Law and the calls that kept getting blocked by the Government to their systems, alerting them that somebody was potentially in some kind of danger.

It wasn't until Clark and Bruce were visiting his parents in Kansas though that they realized just how much they were missing. It was a type of play-date (though they refused to tell Damian that was what this little adventure was called) which was to allow Damian a chance to play with Jon and see the animals the lived on the farm, it also gave Bruce some time away from the city after an injury required him to take two weeks off to allow his shoulder to recover.

Bruce was fine, it was Clark who was worried.

Bruce was watching the two boys play as Jon taught Damian more about milking cows as well as explaining why it was important to do such when both Jon and Clark both stopped suddenly and looked West.

After a moment Jon let out a very worried, "Dad..?"

"I hear it, Jon. You and Damian go inside and get some lunch." Clark said as Jon nodded, then practically dragged Damian away, much to Damian's complaint.

"What's wrong?" Bruce asked as Clark glared west.

"Screaming, specifically a teenager. It's muffled and echoed like he's underground. Whoever is screaming is in trouble."

Bruce frowned, jogging over to his car climbing inside as he quickly began to change into his costume as Clark zipped into the house then zipped back out in costume. "Can you follow the sound?"

"As loud as it is? No problem." Superman said as Bruce pulled on his cowl.

"Good. Take us there."

Superman didn't hesitate to grab Batman's good hand as the two went into the air and flew in the direction of the sound. Batman had no idea what to expect when they arrived as they flew through the Colorado Mountains, but a mansion of a cabin with no cars out front seemingly abandoned was the last thing he expected.

At first there was no sign of anybody or anything in the area. No neighbors, no cars, no sign of a break in, not even any noise that Bruce could hear, only proving to Batman once more that Superman's hearing was nothing to take lightly.

"Where?" Batman asked as they landed.

"Directly under the house. But... it's gone quiet. Too quiet."

Batman frowned, looking at the house and the insignia on the front of it. "Vlad Masters."

"Who?"

"Vlad Masters. He's one of the names on Lex Luthor's paperwork, supplies him with some of his 'space tech' and 'energy'. His business has always been shady but it's always been 'mysterious clean' whenever we look into him." Batman said as he went to the door, using his tech to hack into the security system before they entered the house.

Animal pelts, hunting trophy's, countless other signs that it was some kind of glorious vacation home also suggested that nobody was home. The fire was cold, there was no sign of life, but there was something green on the floor near a wooden vanity that had been broken in half and recently.

Suddenly, Batman heard a low but muffled voice should from near the fireplace.

"YOU EXIST TO SERVE ME! JUST DO IT!"

Batman glared as they both ran towards the fireplace as Batman began to adjust some of the statues when the head of a Vlad bust rolled open at the forehead exposing a red button. Before he could hit the button though there was another voice, this one was clearly a young child.

"YOU ARE NOT THE BOSS OF ME!"

"NO! NO!"

Batman clenched his teeth as he hit the button, the fireplace beginning to open in front of them. Suddenly there were lights on that he could see which lined the staircase. The two began to rush down the stairs, following the sounds of people talking when the young voice spoke again.

"I can do this..." The voice echoed.

"You don't have to. Cover your ears and get behind me."

Batman and Superman made it to the basement just in time to see what happened next. A man with black hair who was dressed as a vampire was approaching two children, a teenage boy and a girl closer to twelve. They both had white hair, green eyes and black and white suits. They looked like siblings, or cousins.

Regardless of their relationship the boy was in front of the girl protectively, sucking in a deep breath before an absolutely horrifying noise ripped it's way out of the boy in a wave of green. Superman immediately smacked his hands over his ears and Batman found himself doing the same thing but he didn't take his eyes off of what was happening in front of him. Machinery and tech was knocked off of the walls, the round cracked, and the vampire was thrown away from him and slammed into the far wall.

The amount of power coming from this one kid was intense and something Batman had never seen before, and judging by the look on the vampire's face it was something he hadn't been expecting from him either. Batman looked back at the boy, who seemed to be getting more pale by the second, his body shaking as tears pricked at the corner of his eyes simply from the amount of energy the ability he was using must have taken.

It wasn't until the vampire seemed to transform from it's vampire appearance to a more familiar appearance of Vlad Masters, a sight that Batman honestly didn't expect to see in such a situation but not one that exactly surprised him either. If Vlad was a meta that made some of the things that didn't make sense before a lot clearer.

Finally, the boy had no energy left as the yell - or rather the wail - cut off, dropping everything that had been thrown against the wall including Vlad. A similar white ring surrounded the teen as he seemed to transform from a white haired green eyed teen to a black haired blue eyed teen that immediately crumbled to his hands and knees. He had bruises from fighting, but the bigger concern were the bruises on his wrists that were clearly from restraints of some kind.

Was the boy the one Superman heard scream?

The young girl checked on the boy, who was shaking and looking like he was seconds away from passing out.

"Out of power... but worth it to take this place down..." He said, seeming to notice Batman and Superman with wide eyes, but the others didn't seem to spot them yet.

Vlad got up and started marching his way towards the kids, transforming back into his vampire appearance as the girl blocked the boy.

"Stay away from him!" She said, her hands glowing green as a puddle of green began to form under her feet.

"Oh, I don't think so girl, you don't dare use your powers again. Danny's beaten, this is over!"

Batman and Superman launched into action as Batman threw one of his batterangs passed Vlad's face, causing him to jump away from the teens. Vlad turned, seeming to expect somebody else but then being absolutely shocked and almost frightened when he saw who was standing in front of him.

"Superman and Batman? Here?" He growled, his hands glowing as he glanced passed them at the kids who seemed almost as frightened as he did. "I can save you both, you know? Take you away from them and keep them safe."

"Think... we're safer away from you, you absolute Fruitloop." The boy said, trying to get up just to stumble and fall again as the girl seemed ready to protect him from Superman.

Vlad laughed, "We'll see about that, Daniel. If you think I'm dangerous... imagine what they'll do with the truth." Vlad suddenly shot up into the air, flying through the ceiling.

"I've got him!" Superman said, flying up the stairs after Vlad while Batman turned to face the two kids.

"Stay back!" The girl warned, her hands glowing again as the puddle started to grow.

Batman held up his hands, taking a step back. "It's alright, nobody's going to hurt you. What's your names?"

The girl looked at the boy who seemed to be fading fast. "If you help him and don't hurt him... I'll tell you everything but if you hurt him... I'll destroy you." She warned.

Batman nodded, "I'll help him, I promise."

She relaxed, finally allowing Batman closer to the teen who looked up at him and tried to move away just to end up falling to the side instead. Batman put his hand out, supporting the teen before helping him sit up more steadily.

He looked at the bruises on the kids wrists then at the container behind him which had shackles in similar shapes and sizes to the bruises on him. Whatever this was, whatever Vlad Masters was doing, clearly surrounded this boy. That meant they had to get him out of there.

Batman carefully picked the teen up, surprised at just how light he was. Did this kid eat? He adjusted his hold on the teen who put his head against Batman's shoulder with a tired sigh as the girl grabbed Batman's cape. He gave her a soft smile before the three of them started marching up the stairs, meeting Superman at the top who sighed.

"He took off towards the North-East." Superman said as Batman nodded with a 'Hm'. "So, what are your names?"

"I'm... I'm Dani and this is Danny." The girl said.

"Two Danny's?" Superman asked, "Doesn't that confuse your parents?"

"Considering my dad is Vlad, I'm guessing not." Dani huffed.

"She's... my clone..." Danny muttered, exhausted as both Superman and Batman blinked in surprise. "But you're not allowed to hurt her. Made by Vlad or not she's my family and I'll protect her..."

"Nobody's going to hurt anybody." Batman promised, "For now we're going to get you somewhere safe and figure things out. Superman, call Flash and tell him where we are, we're going to need a pick up."

Superman nodded, reaching to grab his League Communicator as he walked away while Batman set Danny down on one of the couches.

"Okay, there you go. What did that guy mean when he implied that we were dangerous to you? What do you all think we're going to do to you?"

Dani shrugged as Danny looked at him.

"Anti-Ecto Control Act... what I am, what Plasmius is, what Dani is... we all fall under a law that says we're non-sentient. The law says that anybody with ectoplasm in our blood is to be captured, contained and destroyed. Which means that legally you should be trying to kill us... not help us."

Batman frowned, "I've heard of the law, didn't think it held ground and least of all enough ground to follow." His frown faded as he gave the kids a reassuring smile. "Plus, I'm technically a vigilante, that's hardly legal too. So, what the law doesn't know won't hurt them. Besides, you guys seem plenty sentient to me."

The two Danny's smiled before Dani let out a sniffle as she rubbed her eyes.

"I'm sorry... Danny... I'm sorry." She sobbed, hugging onto the older Danny who hugged her back.

"It's okay, Danielle... it's okay."

It wasn't okay. None of this situation was okay. But, Batman would do everything in his damn power to make sure that it was fixed as soon as possible.

[snakeredbirdbatkatana]

TimKonBartCassie Clone Baby AU

Part 2

He jolts awake from if you call weird dream's about a gun slinging toddler with a flying a dog a restful sleep, to awake in a second.

It takes about ten more seconds for him to realize he is in his room at Titans Tower, his kid is gone which he is not currently too worried about once he remembers the conversation from last night.

He's already heading back to the lounge figuring it a good place to hunt down a secret keeping Impulse and everyone else.

Kon is holding him the baby asleep, while Bart rests in Cassie's lap. Various baby items from bibs, diapers, and clothes are neatly placed to the side of the couch.

Kon greets him with a soft smile that he can't help but return before sliding down next to Bart.

It's comfortable and he's grateful that's no one's mad, that they all just accepted Luci once again he's surprised by how family just goes with it no matter what.

He loves them so much.

It's only been about two minutes before Cassie breaks the silence.

"Alright, we don't know how much you remember but you passed out, we figured the sleep deprivation caught up, Kon carried you to bed, we wanted to wait until you were awake to finish the discussion about everything."

Tim breathes he wants to know everything Bart knows but logically this doesn't just concern them if Jason has a kid he has to inform him. Nevermind that he needs to get back to Gotham and talk to everybody.

"Ok, I think we all should head to Gotham, I can call a family meeting, Bart can finish saying whatever he knows to everyone, because I don't think it's fair that we sit with information that could effect everyone, but I don't just want to decided or do anything I already did, something pretty big without talking to you guys."

"I agree mostly the cave would be the best place, I'm not exactly ecstatic about talking to everyone. I think Rob's right, also I want Jon to meet his nephew."

Kon brings up a point that he hadn't factored in Bruce is a grandfather now Dick is a uncle so is Jason and Damian. He also kinda really wants to show off his baby he finally understands why Bruce keeps photos of them all in his wallet.

"I agree Diana is gonna be all over our little hellraiser and it's a lot easier if we just gather everyone up and do one giant explanation, than doing it a million times. Also I don't know about anyone else but free babysitting is a perk, kiddo didn't want to sleep at all most likely cause Mom passed out on the floor but who knows?"

Tim can't disagree other than, wait why is he mom?

"Tim you talked in your sleep and were very offended that Dad has baby memorie before Mom cause you created him."

Kon laughs distracting him with his sparkly eyes, how unfair.

"I didn't mean to say that out loud and yes I did all the complicated stuff so I will be Mom if I want to although I will share with Cassie if I have to." He pouts. 

It's surreal that he really does mean that and for some reason mom or dad it doesn't matter one bit he has a little baby, his own baby bird.

"Alright boys I think we should get a move on, Tim send out a message and have Batman gather everyone up, he will probably have an easier time then we would."

He grabs his phone he didn't even realize that he had it luckly it's late enough in the day that work and school for everyone shouldn't be a problem.

He texts both Bruce and Alfred that something happened no one is hurt, but he needs everyone in the cave from Supers, Bats, Titans, Outlaws, Wonder Woman's essentially if we would want them to know something important they need to be there as fast as possible.

Not even ten seconds later his phone rings which he expected.

"Tim what's happening?"

He's terrified it's really setting in that he has a a kid.

That he has to tell Bruce.

Yet he's relieved it's Batman, It's Bruce, it's Dad.

He fix anything and hopefully teach him how to change a diaper.

He can't stop the sob that follows.

"I just need you to do this, please Dad it's... I did something stupid, but so amazing and just please I need you ok. I am coming with Young Justice it involves all of us and make sure our family's there, just please. I can't explain over the phone."

"Ok sweetheart I don't know what's going on but it will be ok. Anything can be figured out. Alfred is calling everyone will be here in about an hour. Are you ok? Injuried?"

"No I'm ok just make sure everyone's there Dick, Alfred just we need them. I'll be there in about an hour and a half. I love you."

He hangs up.

-

Bruce is terrified he never dialed so quickly in his life and his son sounds well upset doesn't even begin to cover it, but he knows it's important he only had to look at Alfred before he was calling Jason who was already with Roy picking up Lian.

Dick, Damian, Duke, Cass already are waiting in the cave he practically screamed for them to get down here.

Alfred quietly informing them that something happened and that everyone needs to get to the cave.

Bruce can't move he hears Jason come in but he can't greet him.

Soon the Titans arrive conversing with mainly Roy and Dick.

Clark, Diana and Barry arrive soon after.

He sees Jon talking quietly with Damian finally he gets up.

Looks at his children, teammates and everyone he could possible think of might need to know about a catastrophic event.

He clears his throat.

"I received a message from Young Justice, I don't know what happened, all I know is it's something major apperently no one is injured but they need us I expect whatever is going on is upsetting they will need our support."

He looks at his boys and Cass trying to push reassurance but he doesn't succeed.

Clark and Diana look two seconds away from flying to Titans Tower only stopped by Alfred.

It's been a little over an hour and Bruce wants nothing more than to hunt down his son, and wrap him in his cape but he's stopped by Zeta Tube turning on.

Everyone turns.

Out steps an exhausted looking Connor Kent, followed by Cassie Sandsmark who shoot a quick smile at Bruce which immediately confuses him.

They both block the zeta glaring at everyone until Bart Allen appears holding up a clearly exhausted Tim who still has tear tracks on his face.

He looks like he is gonna drop at any minute but before Bruce can rush to his son.

Tim steps away from all three wrapped in Superboy's Jacket.

The leather falls.

There's a baby.

A exhausted grin comes across Tim's face before he speaks.

"I had a baby, these are the parents also Bart has a story to share...... Surprise?"

Before Bruce can even blink Dick is across the room followed by Jason.

Jason who quickly steals the bundle with a soft coo.

Dick kisses Tim's forehead before picking him up

"I gotcha little brother, to the med bay we go."

Jason follows a step behind purposefully keeping the baby in sight of his third son.

It takes less than a minute before Alfred is checking over Tim only to be quickly interrupted by Kon who is laughing.

"Rob, that phasing could use some work, yes we have a baby, he did not however give birth to it in the traditional sense. Not that I don't agree with the coddling he deserves it. What I want to know is why exactly did you people just steal our kid, if Mom needs a break he's got three Dads over here."

Dick interrupts from his place by Tim's side.

"My little brother is my priority he will be taken care of by me. I assume little brother goes where baby goes so baby will also be taken care of by me. I also could care less of how Littlest Bird came to be, all that matters is my brother and the baby are healthy and ok."

He glares straight at Connor which Bruce quickly joins him how dare that boy. His baby had a baby. He needs his family.

Everyone is still frozen other than his boys.

He walks over to Jason to get a closer look at his granddaughter based off the pink blanket.

He wants to hold her and keep her safe until Tim can but Jason looks two seconds away from shooting anyone who gets to close so she will be perfectly safe.

He will check on his baby instead.

He kisses Tim on the forehead who is being prescribed rest and fluids by Alfred. He will also not be walking anywhere for the foreseeable future he is assuming that there wasn't an actual birth but any excuse to carry his children he will take it.

Damian, and Cass have joined around Tim. Clearly both on guard with their brother so clearly vulnerable. 

"I am really glad you guys are taking it so well, but Bart has important information for us all, and Jay, I would like my baby and maybe a hug from Dick in that order."

Quickly she is given back to Tim and Dick joins wrapping around them a soft smile directed at them both.

"Yeah it might be best if I start talking, cause I think Rob is gonna kill me if I don't."

[ghost-bxrd]

Been reading some of the silver age Batman stuff... Ouch. Reading that and reading canon Bruce?

Ugh, I wanna punch whoever decided they had to make him an edgelord to be 'realistic'.

The silver age plots are goofy and all, I know. WFA plots have a bit of a sitcom feel, I know.

And the modern comics do have a lot of really interesting storylines - like the Court of Owls, Luke's whole WAR arc- and a lot of really creepy awesome villains.

But the problem is the modern mainstream comics? I can barely get through one without wanting to punch Bruce - and occasionally others, but most commonly Bruce - in the face.

And it is tough to enjoy a plotline when the main character is a jerk, if you were first introduced to that main character as a good dad, a good friend.

I really want DC to do a reboot again - or at least start an Elseworlds comic - where they bring back good dad Bruce.

Bruce taking Dick or Jason or whichever Batkid to movies or amusement park? Bruce hanging out with Clark just chatting and being BFFs? Dick just leaving for college instead of getting kicked out at 16? Dick and Jason having a good relationship? Batfam who do mess up, but always try to set it right?

Gimme!

I can totally relate!

The first time I got introduced to the Batman franchise it was with the general outline of “vigilante trying to save people regardless of their past and wrongdoing” which, admittedly, may be a bit shallow as far as characterization is concerned, but damn when I started getting into the batfam fandom and the Robin history… I was stumped.

The early versions of Batman, his trademark characteristic, was that he cared about people. That despite his past trauma, he was still so intrinsically good and kind hearted. He adored children. He never considered anybody beyond saving.

I will never understand how the writers could move from that Batman image onto a version of him that would adopt a child only to later kick him out and then tell another he’s “not interested in teenage rebellion” because “I’m not your dad”. Or even canonically punching one of them in the face hard enough to knock a tooth out, completely unprovoked.

(Not to mention the whole beating Jason up so badly that Jason literally says “I’ve never seen you hit Joker that hard. And you hate him.”… or the batarang incident. Just… yeah.)

It’s just… jarring.

I totally agree with you that there are some very interesting plots (Court of Owls my beloved) but I don’t get how that translates to the writers making Bruce such a horrible dad or mentor. Like, it doesn’t add anything to the story except making the reader dislike him. And not much (if anything) would have changed if they’d at least made him a decent dad/father. At least that’s how I feel.

(Writers should take inspiration from Batman: City of Madness, because the way Bruce handled the scared kid in there… THAT’S what he’s supposed to be like!!!! A gentle yet fierce protector!!!!!!)

So in conclusion… good dad Bruce for the win!!!!! This jerky Bruce isn’t canon for me 😤 Silver Age let’s go 💚

[greenglowinspooks]

Alrighty fellas time for another one

(DPxDC) Batman Rogues ranked based on how good at parenting Danny (and co.) they would be

—

Would probably actually be able to step up and be (relatively) good parents: The Penguin, Mr. Freeze.

They would have EXTREMELY different dynamics with Danny, but I think they could figure it out.

The Penguin would definitely only take in Danny to improve his reputation, and probably so that he could monopolize the use of a new meta’s abilities. (And perhaps to study him)

However, I think that attitude would last for at the absolute most a month, probably closer to two weeks, before he genuinely bonded with him. He’s like the dad who says he doesn’t want a pet, and then in a week they’re inseparable.

He’s not a good person, but I think he could probably end up being an awesome fucking dad. Also, there’s no way in hell anyone would mess with Danny. Not even close. If he found out Danny was getting bullied he’d ruin the bully’s fucking life.

He wouldn’t directly throw hands with a child, sure, but that’s only because it would look bad. He would, however, completely destroy their family’s careers and force them to leave Gotham out of shame.

Mr. Freeze is only a rogue because of his wife. Like, that’s it. He only wants (or wanted, depending on the version) for his wife to be cured and to live happily with her again. All of this is for her, either to help her or to avenge her.

That’s to say that yeah, if Danny managed to weasel his way into his heart, he would have a place with him forever.

He’d probably only interact with him at first because of the ice powers, but if Danny did manage to get closer to him (that’s a pretty big if) I think he’d do fucking anything for him, just like his wife.

He would raze the GiW to the ground for his boy.

They’d do alright probably. Nothing special, but it’d work out ok: Scarecrow, Ivy & Harley, Two-Face, Killer Croc.

Scarecrow is, funnily enough, not that bad. Like, is he genuinely deranged? Yes. Is he murderous and cruel? Yes. Does he have a moral compass that would absolutely support taking care of a child? Yes.

He’s been shown multiple times to genuinely care for people, even if it’s in his own way. Like, yeah, maybe fear-gas-themed murder and torture is a bit far sometimes, but it’s what he knows how to do.

Like, would he know how to take care of a kid? Hell no. But he does have a pretty good list of what not to do, courtesy of his own childhood, so he’d have a pretty alright start.

Ivy and Harley aren’t rated higher because I just don’t think they’d really be responsible enough for a child. I don’t doubt that they’d be able to love Danny, nor that they love each other, but they’re not very stable, and they don’t have a very good grasp on normalcy.

Like, they’d be incredibly cool aunts, or family friends, or something. I just don’t think that they’d do well being the sole guardians of a child or teenager.

I can’t stress this enough, I think they would genuinely love having Danny with all their hearts. I just don’t think that love alone is enough.

Avoiding that genuinely depressing thought, I think Two-Face would similarly be an awesome uncle to have, but wouldn’t do well at the actual “parenting” thing.

Like, he could keep a kid alive no problem, and he’d probably be awesome to have as a legal guardian and stuff, but there’s no way in hell he’d be able to keep Danny in line, for the sole reason of not really seeing a reason to.

However, if he got put in Arkham, he’d 100% not be above guilt-tripping Bruce into taking Danny in, so he does have backup options.

Killer Croc would be an awesome friend to Danny, but that man is in no way capable of being a parent.

He’s got a pretty short temper, and Danny is a little shit. There’d definitely be fighting. A lot of fighting. Croc still gets some points though because he’s a decent guy and I don’t doubt that he’d be willing to get help from the other rogues or even Batman should he need it.

Shouldn’t be trusted to keep a gerbil alive, yet are somehow still better at this than Maddie and Jack: The Riddler, Solomon Grundy

The Riddler is a childish, egotistical asshole with a bit of a god complex and a truckload of emotional baggage.

That being said, he’d still do better than Danny’s actual parents.

Partly because the bar is so low.

Like yeah, there’d be a lot of arguing, but I don’t think that he’d actually ever fight fight with Danny, mostly because he’d feel like he was turning into his father.

For the most part he’d be at the same level as Scarecrow or Killer Croc, I just put him lower because I think he’d forget to feed Danny sometimes. Still not as bad as the food coming alive to attack him though.

Solomon Grundy is pretty similar to Killer Croc in terms of how I think he and Danny would get along, I just think he’d be much worse at getting the things Danny needs to live and be happy.

He’d be cool as a weird uncle, or a friend, but he’d be pretty awful at being an actual parent.

The house is on fire, god is dead: Mad Hatter, Ra’s Al Ghul

Mad Hatter would have UNIMAGINABLE levels of beef with Danny. He would unironically throw hands with a child.

That being said, I think he’d genuinely like Danny.

Wouldn’t make up for anything, but I do think he’d at least not hate him.

Ra’s would be funny as hell no matter what.

He’d ALSO have unimaginable beef with Danny, but for entirely different reasons. He would spend all his time trying to convince Danny to become a member of the LOA and also to turn him fully immortal. Danny would buy him a “world’s okayest dad” mug and “I’m not the dad who stepped up” shirt. They would try to beat each other to death over Damian.

Danny would still probably choose him over Vlad in a heartbeat.

Getting dissected would have unironically been a better option: Joker

Your homework today is to watch Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker.

Because I know you won’t, I’m just gonna tell you that Joker has done some MK Ultra shit to a child before in order to mold it into a mini version of himself, and he’d absolutely do it again.

One of them would absolutely end up dead, and considering their track records, I’m not so sure it would be Joker.

[brucewaynehater101]

I'm seeing a lot of asks about this and I want to give my two cents: I'm cool with Bruce being a bad father, but only if DC admits that he is a bad father.

You can't have him doing downright abusive shit only to never address it. The only character that consistently criticizes Bruce parenting is painted as entitled and vindictive. I genuinely think the reason why we can't have a decent Red Hood arc is because if you want Jason to make sense you're gonna have to admit Bruce is a fucked up father or rewrite canon.

Same reason for Tim "never aging", not so much physically but emotionally. Because to have the character establish itself like Nightwing did you would need to address at some point all the bullshit he went through. Even with Dick. Like sometimes it looks like they want to recognize how being raised by Batman fucked him up by they end up settling for "oh it's the pressure". Like that's the most DC will say "Batman puts his kids under a lot of pressure buuuuuut it's justified because they're fighting evil :)".

Not just the kids, I think Batman himself would be so much more interesting if DC was willing to let him confront these things. As a redemption arc or as a fatal flaw that keeps his family at arms length. But they want to have their cake (have Batman be edgy and give the Robins Character Development™ through good old child abuse) and eat it (have Batman be Dad of the year). And that's what doesn't work.

Batfam fandom is great because you have people making content for Good Father Bruce, Bad Dad Bruce (he's trying and it's a bit funny/tragic), Awful Father Bruce (with no intention of changing. Every option is way more interesting than DC's directionless mess. Like, we don't even need them to make Bruce Good™ we just want them to pick a side and stick to it.

Thank you. My gods that sums it up perfectly.

Like, I've got no problem consuming Good Dad Bruce content... if it's not the comics. The animated stuff is usually fine, and fanwork is also great. There's a ton to like about it.

Hell, I'm even chill if Bruce makes mistakes and errors and fucks up with his kids. That's realistic, as long as they address that he did, in fact, do that shit. They need to talk about how his actions have hurt his kids and his relationships with them. He can try to do better, or he can stay distant with his kids because of it (low to no contact). It's truly not that difficult to chat about.

Now, media that addresses all of the horrid stuff he's done and considers realistic reactions/solutions to it? Fantastic. I love that so much. It's so cathartic watching him get his ass handed to him.

It's not necessary, though. I'm chill with good dad Bruce.

Despite that, outright ignoring what he does or brushing it under the rug? That's horrific. That reads like a sickening cycle of abuse, and I can't stand it. It's the exact same shit an abuser pulls by harming their victim (psychologically, mentally, physically, etc.), apologizing (ish), finding a way to pin the blame back on the victim, and then love bombing. Like, my gods. Bruce will beat the shit out of Jason and say it's Jason's fault for killing someone... "I wouldn't harm you/take a machine to permanetly fuck up your brain if you didn't do that. It's not my fault that I decided to hurt you. It's your fault that I did."

I just fucking can't.

I think Tim, with his little statement of "I don't expect you to apologize" after Bruce caused him to have a nervous breakdown post 16th birthday, that's a close approximation to admitting that Bruce is a piece of shit that does tendencies like an abuser. No matter what someone's intentions are, they should still apologize if they've cause unjustified/unintentional harm. Only assholes who don't regret their actions or people who feel their actions are justified won't apologize. There's times when apologizing isn't necessary or desired. That's fine. I won't apologize if Comic!Bruce and I are in a room, and I "accidentally" set him on fire.

Yet, Bruce is out here fucking up his kids. At the very LEAST, they deserve a fucking apology. Maybe a restraining order.

I ranted a bit. My bad. Anyways, have DC acknowledge the shitty actions Bruce does or don't have him do them. It's simple.

[trekkele]

Patriach!!!!!! I love that fic it's so good and it really made me think about Bruce's relationship with Leslie

*spoilers*

So many Fics have Bruce not liking going to Leslie and I never really thought about it because that's how it's always been

But when Dick starts to point out that Bruce would rather bleed in an alleyway then face one of her lectures and I just sat there

Because kids really want to be accepted!!! And hearing only criticisms all the way well into adulthood will 100% destroy your mental health, and when you think about how much effort and sacrifices Bruce probably had to make to train under the best of the best, only for Leslie (who had an impact on him growing up but also was his dad coworker/friend) to dismiss all of it and tell him that violence is not the answer*.... It must of hurt

(*which is bull, we've been spilling blood for every freedom for as long as we've been around, open a history book Leslie)

I said this once (I think in dms with @wanderintofics) but I think it's very funny how Alfred has been cast into this overbearing mother role and Leslie has been cast as the distant and disappointed father role. Because where Alfred will relentlessly criticize Bruce, and withold care or affection if he feels Bruce doesn't deserve it, he will also always, always come back to Bruces side. It's a whole thing! Meanwhile Leslie will never whithold care, she's a doctor, she's a good doctor, but she will absolutely side with those criticizing Bruce whenever possible.

I think the fact that Leslie has been criticizing him this way since he's a kid influences it the most. Because hearing that your choices are a disappointment and your dead parents would be ashamed of you is. Not great!! Ever!! And since Alfred is literally an employee of the estate, Leslie is technically the only person in his life who gets nothing from him and isn't interested in pleasing or pacifying him. Alfred's criticism would hurt, of course, but there's also a level of "he's meant to be raising me into the perfect heir". Leslie has no such responsibilities, and that means her criticism is entirely personal.

There are two ways to write Leslie, and one is Watsonian (she represents an in universe belief) and the other is Doylest (she represents Batman critics in our universe). And my problem with her as a Doylest criticism is you cannot apply our universe rules to a universe with superheroes. The entire argument against capes falls apart with the first alien invasion. More then that, it simply isn't an interesting critique of the genre, because it inevitably falls into doomerisms and nihilism and I am supremely uninterested of that view of the world.

The Watsonian critique is slightly more interesting, because it at least has Leslie (reasonably!) acknowledge that she lives in a universe where superheros do exist, she is just personally against them. And my issue there is that Leslie is a militant pacifist, which boils down to "she believes you should also die for her beliefs". And. No.

She also believes that all violence is equal, when it clearly isn't and has never been, and insisting that it be treated as if it is is disingenuous and unhelpful. Its how we get people in prison for killing their abusers even in the most clear cut of cases. I disagree with her philosophy in the real world, and not even in a way that means I can agree in the fictional world, if that makes sense.

Leslie is a great character and I think she's very interesting even when I disagree with everything she's saying. I wish she had more screentime as n antagonist. Steph, for one, should not trust her ever again.